I’ve been recently struggling

in Lifestyle

I’ve been recently struggling.

I’ve been recently struggling to find the motivation, drive and creativity to post something worth posting on my blog. Should I post a monthly favourites? Should I write a travel tips post? Should I post a recipe?

No.

I’ve been recently struggling.

I’ve been recently struggling with my anxiety – more than ever. And it’s quite useless for me to post any of the above when my top priority at the moment is to deal with something bigger, much bigger.

So I decided to write about this. I’ve decided to write about how I’m trying to deal with it all – because the truth is that none of us have an actual clue of what we are doing. Professionally we might think that someone is doing better than us because they are better qualified or, to remain current, because they have more followers than we do.

But when it comes to life and dealing with things we don’t get to have someone with a Degree in Living in Such a Crap World (hons) to guide us, and the people with most followers are also probably just winging it – so why not. Why not write about what I’m doing to help myself – hoping it will help someone else.

First of all, I started going for a walk in the countryside first thing in the morning – with no phone or technology whatsoever – just house keys. I spend almost an hour walking the same route everyday and everyday I can see something different – I now know where all the cute dogs live, I’m seeing spring’s beauty slowly turning into summer – lively green turning into burnt gold. I come back home, take a shower and start working.

Secondly, discipline. I make the bed every morning – and I take the stairs and no longer take the lift (unless I’m carrying my body weight in groceries, obviously). I also wash the dishes immediately after eating. These are little things in the greater scheme of life which will eventually, hopefully, lead to better discipline in general. I’ve started adding more things to this list: things I have to do even if I don’t feel like.

Thirdly, I read this. Over and over again. It’s from Aldous Huxley’s The Island:

“It’s dark because you are trying too hard.
Lightly child, lightly. Learn to do everything lightly.
Yes, feel lightly even though you’re feeling deeply.
Just lightly let things happen and lightly cope with them.

[…]

So throw away your baggage and go forward.
There are quicksands all about you, sucking at your feet,
trying to suck you down into fear and self-pity and despair.
That’s why you must walk so lightly.
Lightly my darling,
on tiptoes and no luggage,
not even a sponge bag,
completely unencumbered.”

And finally, I’m admitting my faults, my mistakes. It might seem counterproductive but it’s not – the quicker you admit you’ve made a mistake, the quicker you can start fixing it.

Apologies for the heaviness – by now you should have learnt I’m not the lightest writer.

Take care friends – feel free to leave anything that does help you in such times in the comments below

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